A young man was lost
wandering in a forest, when he came upon
a small house.
He knocked on the door and was greeted
by an ancient Chinese man with a long,
grey beard. "I'm lost," said
the man.
"Can you put me up for the night?"
"Certainly," the Chinese man
said,"but on one condition. If you so
much as lay a finger on my daughter, I
will inflict upon
you the three worst Chinese tortures
known to man."
"Ok," said the man, thinking that the
daughter must be pretty old as well, and
entered the house.
Before dinner, the daughter came down
the stairs. She was young, beautiful, and
had a fantastic figure.
She was obviously attracted to the young
man since she couldn't keep her eyes off him during the meal.
Remembering the old man's warning, he
ignored her and went up to bed alone.
But during he night, he could beari t no
longer, and sneaked into her room for a
night of passion.
He was careful to keep everything quiet
so the old man wouldn't
hear.
Near dawn
he crept back to his room, exhausted, but
happy.
He woke in the morning with the feel of pressure on his chest.
Opening his eyes
he saw a large rock on his chest with a
note on it that read,
"Chinese Torture 1:
Large rock on chest."
"Well, that's pretty crappy," he thought.
"If that's the best the old man can do then I don't have much to
worry about."
He picked the boulder up, walked over to
the window and threw the boulder out.
As he did so he noticed another note on it that read: "Chinese Torture
2: Rock tied
to left testicle."
In a panic he glanced down and saw the rope that was
already getting close to the end.
Figuring that a few broken bones was
better than castration, he jumped out of
the window after the
boulder.
As he plummeted
downward he saw a
large sign on the ground that read,
"Chinese Torture 3: Right testicle tied to
bedpost."