A kid went to the police to report about his lost bicycle this morning...
KID: My new bicycle has been stolen!
POLICE: When did you notice?
KID: This morning.
POLICE: Do you have a suspect?
KID: Yes, my mum and dad.
POLICE: Why do you suspect them?
KID: Yesterday at midnight, I heard mum say, "Make it stand so I can sit on it very well." and dad said, "Climb up fast before it falls." I then heard mum say, "Push Slowly, don't hurt me!"
POLICE: (laughing uncontrollably) Go back home kid, I'm sure they've returned it!