The Miss Universe Pageant concludes tonight (http://newyork.ibtimes.com/articles/212493/20110912/miss-universe-2011-pageant-hot-contestants.htm), in all of its fake-tanned, bleach-blonde, moronic ranting (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/30309104) glory. We wouldn't have it any other way! That's why we offer up all the tools to become an awkward Miss Universe winner. More » (http://gizmodo.com/5839472/the-things-you-need-to-be-a-perfect-pageant-princess/gallery/)
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