A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and after staring for sometime at the only woman seated at the bar, he walked over to her , placed his hands up her skirt and began fondling her.
She jumped up and slapped him silly.
He immediately apologized and explained '' I'm sorry.I thought you were my wife.You look exactly like her ''.
'' Why you drunken worthless insufferable son of a b**ch! '' she screamed.
'' Funny '' he muttered '' You even sound exactly like her ''.